November 29

I know I'm answering a 1986 survey here, but I think it's interesting that some of my preferences have already changed since the first time I filled out one of your surveys. For example I thought ballgags were junk -- until I tried one. Now they even look appealing to me sometimes. I adored fantasies about suspension until I engineered it and learned of its disadvantages.

How many bondage books and magazines do you buy a year?
About 20.

What other forms of erotica do you enjoy?
"Regular" porn. My own drawings. Going to adult stores when I can.

Are you dominant? Submissive? Either or both?
Both.

Do you enjoy spanking and/or tickling with the bondage?
In photos it doesn't affect me. I do like it to a small degree in actual activity.

What is your favorite setting for a bondage scene? Bedroom? Office? Basement or garage? Dungeon?
I like dungeons best, but the rest are all good too.

[Note 2/6/98: I was referring to movie-style medieval dungeons, not the "SM dungeons" we see nowadays.]

At what level do you participate in bondage activities?
Mostly engage in fantasy and tying myself up. Every two weeks or so I get to tie Jace up, but it's mostly a game; we don't have sexual contact. We've known each other many years and have no sexual bonds (pun). Had a few experiences tied up for sex with partners (only done once with each partner). None of them had a true interest in it; it was just done for variety. Just this month I finally tried it with current partner. The experience was much better than the other times.

At what level do you identify with the photographs and stories in our magazines?
Sometimes I pretend I've tied the girl. Sometimes I pretend I am the girl.

How did you first become interested in bondage?
Always was, in fantasies. About four years ago bought first magazine. Didn't start tying Jace until this year. Recently began tying self up.

Is your partner also into bondage? Who first introduced bondage into your lovemaking?
The early few times I tried bondage with sex I guess it was mutually thought up, a planned game along with other strange things tried. This year I've gotten more in touch with my fetish and I'm trying to initiate it and fulfill fantasies, so from now on I plan to introduce it more.

What satisfaction do you derive from bondage as a dominant?
Enjoy looking at tied slave. Enjoy power to touch.

What satisfaction do you derive from bondage as a submissive?
Easier to get excited. Like being touched. Feel sexy.

How important is humiliation to your bondage fantasies?
Not at all... but confession of arousal is good humiliation?

Do you enjoy gags? Why?
Gags imitate the feel of fellatio.

Do you enjoy bondage which leaves the subject sexually available? Bondage which severely restricts the subject's movement?
Subject should only be able to wriggle. Availability is sexy.

Describe your favorite bondage fantasy.
Hard to describe "favorite" bondage fantasy; have many "usual" storylines. Girl in the fantasy is usually dark-haired (I'm blonde) and male is either someone I know or my Fantasy guy Shannon. My fantasy gal is Kiea. She's tied up, either by someone else or by Shannon, and they have sexual activities. Occasionally I have simple rape fantasy; important element is that she actually desires him but for some reason is resisting -- such as, is saying no because he'll get her pregnant or something.

Have you ever acted out your fantasy? Why or why not?
This last time I tried bondage with new partner, it was something like my fantasy. Although part of the physical sensation, for me, is to struggle and wiggle in the ropes, I didn't struggle too much -- because I'm afraid my partner won't understand "rape fantasies." But the bondage was perfect and I wore a skirt and blouse which were pulled partway off. This was all by my telling him how to tie me and what to do. Would be nice another time where he would know ahead of time, so I could then be gagged and not have to explain what elements I wanted. In all, the experience was very good, and he was cooperative and enjoyed himself. But he's not a real bondage fetishist like me, so it loses something, you know?

When engaging in bondage, which is more important to you: the feelings about power or the feelings about sex and love?
Sex.

Describe your perfect bondage partner(s).
Not into daily dominance; just for bondage play. Would like himself to be tied sometimes. Mostly would tie me for sex. Not every time, just sometimes.

How much information do you want to see about basic bondage techniques?
Like suggestions on types of rope, knots etc.

Do you want to meet with other people who share your interest in bondage?
Hope to. Hard for a woman to meet without some danger.

How would you like to do so?
Correspondence, then regular dating. Can't imagine rushing into a bondage situation with a stranger right off. Bondage is too personal.

Comments:
I buy Harmony materials because their writing is good -- but their pictures are very tame, too tame for me, not enough sexual availability. This is okay though, because they're trying to say something about bondage. I buy HOM for the open-crotch bondage pictures. If it weren't for Harmony, though, I would still feel like bondage was sick and masochistic and I don't think I would ever have tried acting out my fantasy. Their writings make me feel better. But for photos I really want to see more. I have about ten Lyndon magazines. Sometimes you do a pretty good job, and I get tired of seeing the pain/strenuous angle in HOM pictures. I'm not into pain pictures, just a tied woman.

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